Friday, November 20, 2015

One

As I'm writing this, I am surprising myself with just how tired I am. It's not quite 8:30pm and already my eyes are drooping, my thoughts are becoming lazy, and I'm trying to make a viable excuse to not go do my laundry.
Which is patiently sitting in front of the washer.
But I have to do my laundry tonight, right now, or I will have no socks for work tomorrow.
Because I am Queen at putting something off until I absolutely have to do it and have left myself with no other choice than to JUST DO IT ALREADY.

See? I'm even writing this so I don't have to go do laundry. It's that terrible. Don't you understand?!

After being unemployed for two months my body has forgotten what it's like to work an honest days work at a standing job. My back aches, and vocal words don't want to form. I've spent most of my day talking to people and repeating the same five or six different phrases.

But. I like my job. I didn't think I would. I was dreading going back to retail after four years away from it. But I really do enjoy it. The store is vibrant, unique, and whimsical; a lot like me. It's like if I had my way in life, had all the money in the world, built a store, and filled it with things that are pretty and snacks that are tasty. See. I can never settle on a decor theme. I change my mind far too often. One day I like rustic, distressed wood. The next I am stuck on Feng Shui.

And World Market is just as indecisive as I am. My easily stimulated senses never tire of the wondrous things my store has to offer.

Everyday it is a battle with my flesh to not buy ANOTHER Christmas ornament or decoration that I know, deep down, I don't actually need. Everyday I remind myself why I am at this job. Why I am here and not back at my old one.
Today, a manager I used to work with at the last Restaurant came in and bought some glasses from me. He was surprised to find me out of my whites and even said "I thought you were, like, Restaurant for life!"

I did too. I really, really did. It's days like these that remind me exactly why I left. Why I hung up my jacket for the last time. Why I took a rather steep pay cut to better my overall well being.
So I sigh, a little, because it is still bittersweet and still hard to talk about with people who knew me as a White.
But then I smile, because I really truly am happy to be where I am now.

"Hi, welcome to World Market! Can I help you find anything today?"